Michael links lip

(no subject)

Dear San Antonio drivers,

1. Stop tailgating me and honking when I'm going the speed limit. Particularly if it is the highway and I'm in the slow lane.

2. Stop passing when there is not enough room to pass. Having to slam on my breaks on the highway to avoid hitting you does not make me happy.

3. Truck drivers, you are not allowed to be in the fast lane. So please don't be there.

4. Please don't turn right from the left lane or left from the right lane when the arrows clearly indicate that you are not to do so.

5. When people are coming onto the highway, you need to let them in. That lane for the entrance ends really quickly, so they need to get over. Don't speed up on purpose to not let them in.

6. Having a sports car does not entitle you to break the law in order to use it to its full potential. Please stop going 30 or 40 miles above the speed limit, switching between lanes, and in general being an asshole. Yes, you have a nice car. Good for you. Now stop it.

7. The speed limit changes at night on the highway. Please pay attention to that. And while we are at it, pay attention to your driving in the rain too. I'd really rather not be hit because your car is skidding or because you can't see me in front of you.

8. To a particular very annoying idiot who I sadly didn't see, please do not hit me in the apartment parking lot. Especially when there are several open spaces next to me and therefore plenty of room. If you do hit me, please do me the courtesy of leaving me your information. We are both poor college students, so you should be aware that I can't afford to get my car fixed and now have a huge dent in one of the doors. Thank you very much for that.

A very annoyed fellow driver
Rizzo :)

That isn't a lane.

Our city is undergoing a lot of construction at the moment.  Particually the highways.

So I'm driving home from work on the highway just minding my business, a mile before my exit I see that they have taken the highway down to one lane by closing off the right lane. I am already driving in the left line so I have nothing to worry about, I check to make sure there is no one beside me in the right lane that might need to get over to avoid hitting the traffic cones, and there isn't.  I continue driving.
A police car is posted a little ways ahead with his lights on, as usual everyone slows down to way below the speed limit for fear of getting pulled over, no big deal, no one likes a ticket for speeding. We pass the cop car and the person in front of me is still traveling pretty slow, maybe 5 miles below the posted speed limit for a construction zone.  Again, understandable, there's traffic cones to our right and the road is pretty bumpy. 
My exit is coming up so I put my turn signal on and begin to merge into the off ramp lane, keep in mind, right lane is closed. 

All of a sudden I hear this rumbling noise, no sooner did I slow down and look around did I see a silver mustang speeding past me to my left. 
News flash dickbag, you are in a lane that doesn't fucking exist.  That sound that you hear is you driving on the rumblestrip! Thank god I slowed down and didn't completely merge over or else we would have hit. 
Okay, your a motherfucker.   I'm assuming that you wanted to get off the highway and were in a hurry to do so and didn't realize that I had put my turn signal on to exit. 
But then for you to drive almost the whole way off the exit ramp to only at the last split second get back into the highway lane, cutting off and squeezing between the 2 cars in front of me is just fucking ridiculous.  I also noticed that during this whole event you never slowed down from your 80+ miles an hour you were driving when everyone else around you is traveling at 55.
Fuck you. I hope you smash your dick in your door. :)

No Passing on the Left

My dad witnessed an accident on our street a couple of days ago where both drivers made stupid mistakes although one was definitely at fault much more than the other. Our neighbor from two houses down was coming down the street with a red truck tailgating him. When he got near his house, he slowed to turn left into his driveway but he didn't put his blinker on. The driver of the red truck assumed he was slowing down to make a right onto a side street which was just ahead of them and he didn't want to wait so he tried to speed past him on the left.

The result was the neighbor started to turn and crashed into him with such force that the red truck was driven over the curb and knocked over a metal street sign. The driver got out and started yelling at the neighbor for not using a blinker and the neighbor yelled back at him for trying to pass him like that. Luckily, it didn't go any further than that and no one was hurt. My dad called 911 and the cops got there quickly. The red truck had to be towed away on a flatbed truck due to the amount of damage.

The neighbor should have used his blinker but the other guy was obviously much more at fault. He shouldn't have been tailgating and he shouldn't have tried to pass him on the left on a residential street with only one lane on each side. Hopefully he learned his lesson from this although I doubt it.

Fire truck!

So one day my wife and I are driving westbound on a county road which leads into the east side of Evansville. This road has an overpass that crosses the interstate, and at the time there was construction taking place on the west side of the overpass. As we are driving, there is a yellow pickup right behind us on our tail. As we crest the overpass that goes over the interstate, we see a fire truck with lights & sirens coming straight at us in our lane because he is trying to navigate through the stopped cars in the construction zone(effectivley making the construction zone a single lane road due to stopped cars on the side of the road). We immediately slow down and pull over to the right side of the road so the fire truck can make it's way through. Yellow pickup did not like this - laid on his horn, and glared at us as he guns passed us. Because he was focusing his attention on us he did not see the fire truck heading straight for him. As soon as his back end cleared our front end, fire truck blasts his horn and yellow pickup freaks out, immediately pulling over to the side and slamming on his brakes. As the fire truck passes us, the driver of the fire truck sticks his hand out the window with a "what are you thinking??" gesture. Gotta love instant karma.

(no subject)

Drivers in the Phoenix area:

Stop turning right in front of me when the light is green on my side and you have a red arrow, stop changing lanes at the last minute without signaling, and actually look to see if other cars and pedestrians are around before backing out of a parking space. Stop honking at me because I don't want to go 40mph over the speed limit like you want to. Also, give me a few seconds to finish backing my car out of the parking space instead of honking or trying to squeeze past me.

Observational Skills for the Severely Obtuse

OK, so, you see the BIG SIGN in the right-hand lane ahead that has a big arrow pointing left? And the traffic cones all around it? And the electricians' truck in the middle of the traffic cones?

That means that a section of the right lane is temporarily closed. The red vehicle in front of you got into the right-hand lane in order to turn right at a traffic light BEFORE the lane closure. Get out of that lane. You shouldn't be there. Seriously. Get out.

...Yes, I will let you in at the last possible second, because I don't like being side-swiped. You're fucking welcome.

(no subject)

 Dear general CT drivers,

Please stop cutting me off, particularly when the end result is that my brakes get tested as I manage to stop roughly one foot from your bumper! Man I wish that I could hit you and not be faulted, stupid insurance policies. I really wish there was a way to fault the driver who cuts other people off, but no, in our state the person who "hits" is the one who gets 100% of the blame.

Also to the general driving public, USE YOUR FUCKING TURN SIGNALS!!!!!!!!!!!! I try to be decent and let you, but when I can't tell if you trying to turn left (into my lane) or right (into the flow of traffic) well I can't really let you out now can I?

(no subject)

 To the people in my neighborhood who insist on making a right on red when I have the right of way (green light and am going straight through the four way) fuck you very much. I will honk at you for several seconds and I will end up briefly tailgating you until there is distance again. I sincerely hope that the next time you do this one of the fire engines from two blocks up the road comes through the intersection at 70 and makes you shit yourself and think twice about cutting somebody off.

Can't you see???

I don't know if this is the same for all Wal Marts but now I know why 1) I hate driving and 2) I would rather someone else do it.

It seems that when you need cops, they are not around and it seems that passing that no cell phone law was just redundent as can be.

At our local Wal Mart, we have the entrances (two of them) from Berkley Road (which is a four lane with one itty bitty middle lane) One takes you past the oil changing and the other comes off into the main parking lot.

Now, at this crossroad, there are two stop signs. Both for stopping traffic in the parking lot,so that the traffic won't back into the busy road and have multiple wreaks. However, this woman driver takes the cake.

Not only did she not stop, she blew right through the stop sign. Not yeild, but a nice red and white sign that I know she can see. She didn't do a Cali roll, oh no, she kept on booking. She was on her cell phone and even had enough nerve to scream that me and my husband were Assholes.

How were we in the wrong whenever this chick was not driving correctly, didn't stop at the stop sign and was blabbing on her cell phone? If my husband wouldn't have stopped when we did (almost causing us to get hit from behind) she would have took us out with her car.

The whole reason the stop signs are there are due to that road entrance. The parking lot stops, not the entrance road..there is a reason for that. And wouldn't you know it, not a cop around...
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Bad Kitty

Two idiots who need to...

...learn how to drive.

1) I'm in the left turn only lane at a light. The light turns green for the people going straight or taking rights but the left turn arrow is still red. The guy in front of me takes a left running the red light and almost gets creamed by oncoming traffic.

To the guy behind me: You can honk your horn, flash your lights, throw your arms in the air in disgust, slam your steering wheel and scream until you are blue in the face, I am still not running a red light and making an illegal left turn just because the guy in front of me did it. Even when there is no more on coming traffic I am still going to wait until I have a green arrow as opposed to that red arrow.

2) To the completely different person behind me at a different intersection who was doing a fair impression of the guy from story number 1: I am well aware that it is legal to take a right turn on a red light after coming to a stop in this state. That is unless the intersection has a sign posted stating, "NO RIGHT TURN ON RED" as this intersection does. Once again, scream until you are blue in the face if it makes you feel better, I'm still not making an illegal right on red and I will be waiting for the light to turn green.